Isolde: What I would change... Nothing


  • TIDE POOLS ✰

    When I was younger I used to dream about my future. I was going to be a professional scholar of some sort. I was going to finish high school a year early and go to Brown. After that I was going to live with my bestfriend Nadia in a classy New York apartment.
    I am however a prossional writer. I am not graduating early, and not headed to Brown but a little college in Denmark. After college instead of living with Nadia Im going to be living with my loving husband and our son or daughter.
    The world works in mysterious ways, and as much as you would think you have control over it you do not in most cases. I am a firm believer in the quote"Everything happens for a reason."
    Would I want to change a few things? Maybe, but they wouldnt be the big things. Id change the dress I wore to ninth grade homecoming. It was orange and looking back on it was very ugly. I would change the fact I was wearing pajamas when Jake proposed to me. I would not however change the fact I tried to kill myself. As strange as it sounds it helped me. I was so sad during that time in my life. I was at the lowest I could ever be and without that incident I'm not sure if I could have gotten through it.
    Would I change the fact I dated a ten year older man that I could not stand? I don't think so, because if I never dated him then I would not have realized how much I missed Jake, and ultimately I would have never called him to resue me. Now for the big one. Would I have changed anything about the Oleary diaster? No.... I have tried to blame myself for it all, but I had no control over his actions. I know I did not lead him on in anyway. He chose to hold everyone hostage , not me. He also chose to pull the trigger that shot Sylvia and help wound Brennan. I never meant for them to get hurt. That I would change,however Sylvia knew what she was doing. If the bullitt would have hit me... well I would be dead right now.
    Everything happens for a reason. Every mistake I have made has brought me here. And, as I look down at my ever growing stomache and look at my husband and little puppy sleeping next to me. I would not change a thing.

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